The day started out cold and drizzly and uninviting. I woke up far too early and tried to sleep longer without success. I finally decided to get to the convention center and learn more about dementia. The problem is that after all these years of practicing, there is little that is new or something that I have not heard before. The field of psychiatry is advancing rapidly, but the basics are unchanged. I keep hoping I will learn something I have not heard before, but today was all about the usual information, nothing new, nothing that will change the way I practice psychiatry. Of course, I do not see much dementia in my practice anyway.
I met my sisters as the sun was breaking through. Monica wanted to show us new and interesting architecture, and I was most impressed with the new UCSF buildings on the waterfront. I had not seen them before, so this was an entirely new part of San Francisco for me. We drove along the water to Golden Gate Park and to a wonderful sushi restaurant. I always like unagi and tempura best, so I indulged myself. The day warmed up as the day progressed, so after a coffee at Union Square, we walked through Chinatown to City Lights bookstore. I realized how familiar I am with this city, having visited many many times. It is stunningly beautiful, with incredible views at every corner. I think if I had to choose a perfect city to live in, it would be San Francisco, not New York, simply because physically, there is no comparison. Not that I could afford to live in either place, unfortunately. I fantasize about not returning to Baltimore to live. What if I could live anywhere; where could it be?
We met my friends Alan and Vickie again for dinner, at a Mexican restaurant next to my hotel called 'Colibri' and I am still feeling the effects of the absolutely best mojitos ever! We reminisced about living in Salt Lake with another friend who joined us. When I tell people about my plans for Ecuador, I do experience double-takes and surprise and I am not sure if the reaction is that I am off my rocker and why would I do anything quite so 'off the grid'. I am never quite sure how to explain why I am doing this or what I plan to do. I realize as I explain this venture that perhaps this is possible for me because I am not particularly attached to our lives in Baltimore. I FEEL connected to our lives and it is more difficult for me to leave than I expected, but perhaps not so difficult as it could be. I do not have much in material things, I don't make much money, I am not attached to a place or an identity or a purpose. I am surprised that I am struggling as much as I am. I am taking all of my family with me, and it is my family that I am connected to, so I am not leaving the most essential part of my life behind.
I guess I am trying to sort this all out.