Winding Down

I am avoiding paperwork, but that is not unusual. I prefer to see patients, to talk to my colleagues, to check my email, to call people, to do almost anything rather than attack the pile of paper that faces me as I walk into work. I am making the most of my minimalist office, with three uncomfortable chairs and my computer and printer siting precariously on two old file cabinets. I have to twist around and contort my body to type on my keyboard, so it is literally a stretch to use the computer anyway. I was reminded today that the new physician wants to move in July 1, so I have to use the last two days I am in the office to get everything out. That is in between the scheduled patients, who come every hour or half hour. My day is less hectic than it ordinarily is as I wind down my practice and say goodbye. I am not unhappy or stressed, just do not want to go file my papers. I am at my other office tomorrow where filing is not the issue, but I am behind on billing and I will have to send out all my bills so I can get paid and them pay my own bills. I am looking forward to the day that I am not making any money at all and can forget about paying bills; I cannot believe I am actually thinking of the relief I will feel when I am dependent entirely on someone else for my existence.

I came home from my workday to face the even more ominous task of organizing and boxing our belongings. Once again, I encounter all sorts of other more important tasks to avoid what I absolutely must do. I took a ballet class, I picked up Maya and practiced violin with her and put her to bed and then washed dishes and prepared for the day tomorrow and watched Bill Maher and now I think I have no valid excuses and will start on my boxes.

I am finally looking at flights to Ecuador. The prices have been increasing over the past weeks, and I realize that I should have made a decision a month ago. Now I am hesitant because I do not have a passport and am not sure if or when I will have one. I am delaying again. I have agreed to call the passport office in Canada tomorrow to see if my application has been accepted. I will choose a date and commit to a flight by this time tomorrow!